Lost: one
Dominic Monaghan. Sometimes goes by the name of Charlie. If found, please send to Penny.
lost: sean
biggerstaff's fone #if found plz contact spellingimpaired@ineedadictionary.com
Single,
Female, mid 20's, seeking a good time. Will marf anything that'll stand up. Also enjoy's long walks on the beach. If interested,
please email godimsodesperate@marfme.net
High school
student seeking university willing to give burseries and/or scholarships. If interested, please contact ballofkilt@stressedout.com
Portuch
seeking Scottish male. Preferably actor, from Glasgow. If interested please contact ohmyfsckinggawdseanissohot@portuch.com
Badger seeking
another wifey. Please apply in chat. No experience necessary.
Girls seeking
slash. Proper spellings and grammar required.
Chatter
seeking @ If have extra @ willing to donate please contact anonchatter@SBChat.com
Badgers
seeking men in kilts. Please apply in person.
SBMB seeking
actor to say marf. Speaking ability preffered. Please contact over television, by saying 'marf.'
Portuch
seeking a *thwap!!!!*. If hands are not too busy, please donate one hand for thwappage. For information, please seek LYKEOMAHGAWDSEANIZHOTT@thebitchMUSTdie!.com
Wanted Jude
Law. Please send to AleXx or Lauren. Alive.
Wanted:
Johnneh. Please send to Cola
Wanted:
several Monaboyd fanfictions. Please send to Mavvy@pr0n.com
Wanted:
One life. Preferences: Young, big-breasted, in shape, and has a penis. For information, please contact wormpeniiperv@igotsnolife&nowife.com
Wanted:
one Toby. Please send to Penis.
Wanted:
one million dollars in unmarked bills. Please send to AmberB@brokeoffherass.com
Wanted:
one BF reunion. If interested, please contact AmberB@missingyou.com
Wanted:
one Flannel reunion. You know who you are. Contact admiralflannel@hickharry.com
Wanted:
a life. Please contact SBMBgirls@SBMB.com
Wanted Sean's
babies. Please send to ILOVESEAN@portuch.com
Wanted Sean's
heart. Preferably in glass jar. Please send to Titsy@McLure.com
Wanted Rocks.
Send to SBMBgirls@SBMB.com
Wanted:
Divorce papers from Sean. Please send to Melis@disgruntledwife.com
Wanted:
Autographed picture from Sean. Send to me
Wanted:
The HP boys. Dan and Tom preferably. Please send to klo@pervingthehpboys.com
Wanted:
lots of sleep and less homework. If you have any information, please send to AmberB@cantwaittograduatefromcollege.com
Wanted:
motivation. Send to AmberB@senioritis.com
Wanted:
Sweater or warm blanket. Send to Penny@freezingherbumoff.com
Wanted:
people to stop lurking in chat. If interested, contact chatter@QUITLURKING!!!.com
Wanted:
Sugar Daddy. Must have money and Sugar. Apply to sbcgirls@brokeashell.com
Wanted:
A good, healthy relationship*. Must have nice-sized penis, knowledge of Kama Sutra, and one free night/early morning. Phone
call or further contact afterwards is not needed. For more information, contact iwantyoursex@bowchickabowbow.com
* one night stand
of hot monkey sex